For those of you not familiar with Lurlene McDaniel, she writes books about teenagers with terminal illnesses. Fun! Okay, so they're all pretty much depressing, and some of the language used sounds like it could definitely have come from a woman named Lurlene (like continuously calling asses fannies), but they're pretty good nonetheless. She had done many standalone books, and also a collection called One Last Wish, which had the same premise as the other books except the terminally ill teenager was sent an anonymous letter and check for $100, 000 from the One Last Wish Foundation. Sweet! Within this collection of books were another collection about 3 friends; Katie, Chelsea, and Lacey. Each girl has her own book, and there are two books of the three when they are together. The books aren't numbered, but they do have a chronological order, this one being the second to last in the collection, and about Lacey. I didn't feel like doing the books in order because I like Lacey the best, so there.
Okay, first of all, Lacey kicks ass. She's so my ho. Lacey is the typical aloof ice queen in many ways, but she never takes shit from anyone and has some awesome comebacks. Lacey has diabetes, though, and mega issues surrounding accepting that fact. I don't really know how she can ignore the fact that she has to give herself injections everyday, but whatever. She probably just says something nasty to the syringe and goes for it.
So Lacey has been packing on the pounds, which distresses her because she is starting to work on her high school's play and the hottest guy in school, Todd, is the play's star. Lacey has a huge boner for Todd, which I don't understand because he's an enormous asshole (and possibly in the closet), but whatevs. However, Lacey has to compete for Todd's affection with another girl in her high school, a part time model named Monet. I guess that means her pictures must be taken from far away. Monet is a stank ass ho, for real, and a conceited bitch to boot. I kind of love her.
Anyway, Lacey has hidden her diabetes from everyone, and then starts messing around with her insulin doses to lose weight. Smart! Her ex lover, I guess, Jeff also has transferred schools and is now at the University of Miami, conveniently located by Lacey. Jeff is creepy as all hell and basically says really uncomfortable things letting Lacey know he wants to tap that ass. Lurlene tries to play it off as endearing and unrequited love, but he's really a few steps away from registering as a sex offender. He also is a hemophiliac, but has the annoying tendency to refer to himself as a "bleeder" every third sentence. Um, Jeff? Constantly reminding a girl who avoids her own disease that you aren't perfect in the health area is not the way to get into her pants. Just saying, buddy.
Lacey basically tries her best to avoid Jeff, and I can't say I blame her, and hangs out with another girl who is working on the play named Terri. Terri loves chocolate, and context clues refer that it loves her back. She mentions chocolate and food about as often as Jeff calls himself a bleeder. I bet they could have some bloody and delicious conversations. She also thinks Todd sucks and that Monet is a stank ass ho, so she's cool in my book. Lacey doesn't disclose her illness to Terri, who in turn takes her out and proceeds to stuff her face with lobster, steak, and ice cream. Terri rocks.
So Lacey hides in the bathroom during play rehearsals one night and gives herself her lower insulin injection. During this, Monet comes in fresh off a beer and pizza dinner date with Todd, and proceeds to barf up her meal. Lacey confronts her, and Monet tells her to grow up, because I guess concern about bulimia is immature. Monet then spots the syringe in Lacey's hand and accuses her of doing drugs. Lacey is so dumb, she could've put the syringe back in her purse after using it, but noooooo. Lacey lies and tells Monet that she has allergies and takes shots to build up resistance, which I totally wouldn't believe, but Monet buys it and basically tells Lacey that if she's cool she'll keeping the pukefest a secret. Lacey agrees to, which seems unlike her character, because the Lacey I love doesn't do favors for anyone. Oh well.
Lacey introduces puking into her weight loss regimen, and combined with not taking enough insulin, feels sick as all hell. Todd apparently likes his women to look ill, though, and asks her out. He takes her to a college party and basically gets drunk and hits on other girls and ignores her. Real catch there, Lacey. As if it wasn't already the date from hell, Jeff is at the party. After reminding Lacey that he is a bleeder and creepily hitting on her, he gives her a ride home because Todd is way too drunk to drive. He probably slept with some guy after she left, but we'll never know. Todd is way pissed the next day about Lacey leaving with another guy (though he'd feel sorry for her if he met Jeff) and proceeds to dump her, or whatever it's called after you've had one date and don't want to see the other person again. Lacey is disappointed, but plays it off in front of Terri that it's no big deal.
Dress rehearsal time! Lacey is in charge of makeup, specifically Todd's makeup, and he smells her puke breath and asks her if she painted her fingernails recently. I tend to believe that he was just asking because he wanted to borrow her nail polish, but whatevs. Lacey starts feeling gross again, and passes out.
So she wakes up 3 days later and finds out she went into a diabetic coma. Even worse, now everyone at school knows about her illness. Still worse, Terri informs her that Todd is taking puke breath Monet to the prom. Thanks, Terri. Yet the ultimate worst part of her hospital experience is that Jeff comes to visit her, and announces that he's a hemophiliac. Really, Jeff? I had no clue! If only Todd could be as open about his sexuality as Jeff is about being a bleeder. Lacey refuses to tell her doctor, who is also her uncle, how she could have gotten so sick and why her esophagus is irritated, and is rewarded with a few week long vacation in the lovely hospital! Grand!
After psychiatric evaluation and a bajillion tests, she admits screwing around with her insulin dosage and barfing up her dinners. She is eventually let out of the hospital, and now the reader is supposed to ponder over what will become of her relationship with Jeff. I guess we were supposed to feel the chemistry between them and hope for them to get together or something. I, however, did no such pondering, and just wanted that lame ass bleeder to get the hell out. No such luck, they remain friends for now, and will let the future decide on their dating status. Run while you can, Lacey!
Here's the cover of my copy because Amazon only had a picture of the new edition. Please excuse the huge fold across Lacey's face. Anyway, Lacey looks pretty hot to me, and not in the least bit overweight like she feels she is in the book. She looks kind of exasperated, but that's probably because Jeff just told her he's a hemophiliac for the 9000th time. Jeff is exactly how I pictured him: skinny, pale, and creepy. He even has creepy wavy bangs and sideburns. Notice his tight grip on Lacey's shoulder, too.
Coming up soon: Lacey, Katie, and Chelsea meet up again, and Jeff lands in the hospital. Everyone is shocked to learn that it's because he's a hemophiliac. Also, some Baby-sitters Club goodness, with a little Sweet Valley High thrown in. Awesome.